In times of grief and loss, we know we will suffer mentally and emotionally. Yet we often forget the impact that grief has on our bodies. Often people view the physical symptoms of grief as normal or something we have to push through.
Your body holds all the emotions and memories of loss. You may have been caring for someone and not had time to care for yourself, you might be trying to be ‘strong’ for others or you may have even been avoiding your grief by keeping busy.
If you haven’t lost a person you might not even realise that you are in the grief process. Many people forget that there are other instances in life that cause the grief reaction. You can read my blog post about other reasons we grieve, here.
How the body reacts to grief
Humans walk around thinking we are resilient and we can power through anything. Truthfully, we all need time to rest, process and recover. You might believe you have given yourself even time to grieve but your body can be tell a different story.
Firstly, if you are experiencing any of the following after a loss, it is normal. Your body is telling you to slow down, look after yourself and allow yourself to grieve. However, if some months have passed, and you are still experiencing these symptoms, please seek medical advice.
- Headaches/migraine
- Upset stomach
- Aches and pains
- Exhaustion
- Palpitations/racing heart
- Shortness of breath/feeling like you can’t breathe
- Changes in appetite
- Restlessness
- Not being able to sleep
- Nightmares
- Poor concentration
- Confusion
- Tension
- Isolation
- Blurred vision
- Loss of feeling
- An ache like a longing to hold the person who has died
- Feelings and sensations after loss of a body part
- Getting sick more frequently
These symptoms of grief can be confusing and scary, you may think there is something physically wrong. For your peace of mind and to ensure that you are looking after yourself properly it is always best to talk to your GP, if you have any worries.
Easing the physical symptoms of grief
Taking care of yourself can help you navigate the grief process. I know that seems obvious, but in reality self-care can be incredibly difficult to keep on top of.
- Try to eat well. Often people don’t want to eat when they are grieving. Eating a little of something you fancy is better than nothing. Comfort eating? Cut down on one thing you eat a lot of that isn’t healthy.
- The same goes for drinking. As tempting as it is to block out feelings with alcohol, drinking water is essential. Mixing it up by having a soothing cup of tea or a milky coffee can be relaxing.
- Physical exercise is great for releasing emotions. The key is tailor your exercise to your feelings. Whilst going hard inn the gym can help with anger, walking in a green space can help reduce stress and anxiety.
- Be productive, small accomplishments and distractions can help. Just getting out of bed and making it or finishing a book you wanted to read can help.
- Do nothing. Sometimes we just have to stop. You could lie in bed all day, take a long bath, read a book book. Turn off the phone and social media and just have time to yourself.
- Learn to meditate. Meditation and body scanning help to bring your body and mind together. This a can be seated or walking mediation, the point is to be in touch with your physical reactions.
Give yourself space and time
Remember we all grieve in our own way, there is no ‘right or wrong way’ and it isn’t a simple journey. Grieving a loss, no matter how trivial it may seem to others, is how we process our thoughts and emotions around that experience. Be kind to yourself, listen to your body and ask for help if you need it.
Reaching out can be difficult and you might not know who to turn to. These organisations may be able to help if you live in the UK:
MIND
